Today a UPS staff member decided (unknowingly, I'm sure), to make my life more challenging.
S/he chose not to deliver my replacement phone to the address I specifically provided to the insurance company. Probably because I used my office - which, as a reminder, is where I'm having all my mail sent.
The United States Post Office doesn't seem to have a problem finding me.
Perhaps it's because they don't make assumptions.
I even had my staff make a note for the admin assistant who was going to be working this morning to be sure to accept the package for me - because it was my phone - and I needed it to be signed for.
However, it never even got that far because they took one look at the address and decided that because it didn't have an apartment number on it, it couldn't possibly be delivered.
I'm sure in theory, most of the time, this is true.
However, it wasn't today.
I will call this "Human Error Number One."
So when I went to track the progress today, and found out that they decided to return it to sender, it just about sent me over the deep end.
I sat on the floor, used the landline (that I had to learn the number of yesterday so my staff could call me with any emergencies - good thing, because we had a water main break in the wee hours of the morning - the second call I got to make to my boss this week), and hunted down my phone.
I think the woman could hear that I was on the verge of losing it in my voice, as she was able to track it down - a man named Craig at the UPS shipping dock (on the other side of town) had it in hand.
She said I could go and pick it up anytime before 4.
Great. I had an apartment to view at 2:00.
After mapquesting everything, I realized that I would need to look at the apartment first, then cross town to pick up the damn phone, and then drive back to the other side to run the errands that I needed to get done today.
This is where "Human Error Number Two" came into play.
It was my own.
Apparently I put in " 251 N. Yellowstone Drive" when I should have put "251 S. Yellowstone Drive into mapquest."
One freaking letter just about caused a major meltdown.
Because I couldn't find where I was supposed to be.
And I didn't have a phone. I forgot the "emergency" phone my staff had lent me.
I guess we can call this Human Error Number Three.
Mine also.
So I couldn't call anyone - not a friend to look up the number, or the leasing agent who was supposed to show me an apartment.
After contemplating finding a random establishment that might have a computer to look up the number for me, I chose instead to leave the area and drove to the other side of town, to the UPS place.
Where I couldn't find anyone. It was closed. Apparently THEY AREN'T OPEN ON SATURDAYS.
Who the hell is Craig and what was he thinking?
I rang a random doorbell next to an employee entrance that I eventually went in - (the door was unlocked), and found no one. Wandered around the loading area - nothing.
Went back outside, got in my car, and slowly drove around the building.
Cursing UPS, and the rest of the world.
Starting to write a letter to them in my head.
Finally saw another human being on the complete opposite side of the building.
Two guys were in the back of a truck and looked at me like I had two heads.
Before I got out of my car, I reminded myself not to kill the messanger.
But after sharing a snippet of my story, one of them kindly went inside and found my phone.
Which, of course, is supposed to be charged for 12 hours. [Not gonna lie - when I read the instructions, I literally almost went off the deep end.]
So again, I curse the tool that chose not to deliver my phone when it should have been.
I took a deep breath, and decided that I'd gone this long without a phone, had already missed my appointment, and wasn't going to be able to find the place in a timely enough manner anyway, so I should just move on with my life, and my planned shopping outing.
Needless to say, I took my revenge out on my checking account, and purchased some very important items: "Now That's What I Call Christmas! Volume 4", brown boots, and doritos, among other things. The local economy can thank the UPS dude.
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